Redang

I didn't say much about this, but I almost lost my phone on my trip!

We woke up at about 7 in the morning after an all-night bus trip, and I groggily followed samson out of the bus, almost tripping on myself, when suddenly I had a mental alarm go off in my head

CRAP!

something's wrong.

what's wrong?

i don't know.

something isn't quite right.


The moment I patted my hands on my side pockets I knew what had happened.. I left my phone on the bus seat..

But to cut a long story short, I had kinda given up on the phone and made up my mind to still have a good time.. We were walking around waiting before checking in when suddenly we spotted one of the guys who was on our bus

"Hey one of you left your phone on the bus right? Yeah its with me wait here.."

whoa. Thats like.. 1 in a million...

I won't spoil the testimony, but I'll just show some pictures.















The wind is amazingly strong on the top deck of the boat, but Calvin's hair is impeccable. Calvin is seriously the coolest man.....
















The great naval general Samson inspects his boat.
















This one doesn't quite need a caption.















Guys before snorkelling
















Girls before snorkelling
















The cool guy (Calvin not me) in action again
















Chilling at the beach listening to the live band















Estella looking like she's about to be kissed by a toilet brush.






























The weirdest ferry ride on the planet, only because of the videos they played during the ride. Yuck. I want to dip my head in dettol.

But all in all it was a great trip.. The sand is really amazing and you'll start to wonder why you even bothered bringing slippers..

If only I stayed in a place like that..

Off to Redang..

Its been a bit hard to pack.. I don't know.. I probably don't need very many things..

Hmn.

Oh well...

Maybe I feel that there's lots to things undone.. Things to accomplish..

Never mind.... I quote Takeshi Kaneshiro in Red Cliff:

'我要冷静一下'

Probably what I need most right now..

Wish me a safe journey!

Onward

Why is it so hard....

Argh.

I don't understand...

Everyone makes mistakes

Hello all..

I'm typing this because I was thinking and mulling over something I learnt on Sunday. Basically some people messed up and well, now many people now know they messed up..

As a result of their guilt they have since taken to shying away from everyone, and a lot of us haven't seen them in a long while.. i wanted to say 'As a result of their mistake' but that would be inaccurate. Mistakes don't make you shy away. Guilt and self-pity might be the culprits..


In any disaster there HAS to be an effective way to help. (i believe so, at least) Or at least there are multiple effective ways to help.

(For those of us familiar with the Lagrangian formalism of classical mechanics, this constraint part will sound very similar)

Considering the various circumstances under which the mishap occurred, there are constraints which we have to consider. Perhaps there is a death in the family. Perhaps there is a financial crisis. Perhaps there is a grave illness. Perhaps there is a lack of family ties. The list goes on.

These constraints serve to limit the avenues of approach. Also, they might lend a clue to areas which we have to be sensitive in.



After considering the constraints, we must study the system. What happened?
Is it totally despicably unforgivable?

C.S. Lewis mentions in Mere Christianity that :
'It is a terrible thing that the worst of all the vices can struggle itself into the very centre of our religious life. But you can see why. The other, and less bad, vices come from the devil working on us through our animal nature. But this does not come through our animal nature at all. It comes direct from Hell. It is purely spiritual: consequently it is far more subtle and deadly. For the same reason, Pride can often be used to beat down the simpler vices. Teachers, in fact, often appeal to a boy's Pride, or, as they call it, his self-respect, to make him behave decently: many a man has overcome cowardive, or lust, or ill-temper, by learning to think that they are beneath his dignity - that is, by Pride. The devil laughs. He is perfectly content to see you becoming chaste and brave and self-controlled provided, all the time, he is setting up in you the Dictatorship of Pride - just as he would be quite ontent to see your chilblains cured if he was allowed, in return, to give you cancer. For Pride is spiritual cancer: it eats up the very possibility of love, or contentment, or even common sense'

John Ortberg, in Everybody's Normal Till You Get To Know Them mentions that historically there are two categories for sin. Sins of the flesh and sins of the spirit. Regarding the latter:

'Rarely does a church exercise discipline over one of these sins. If you hear a pastor having to leave a church for "moral reasons," you can be pretty sure it's not pride. Churches in our day are not usually scandalised by sins like arrogance or self-righteousness.'

And afterward he concludes:
'We are most scandalised by sins of the flesh. Jesus was most scandalised by sins of the spirit.'

I don't think I'll further the discussion, because at this point it is first apparent that we can now leave all judgment in God's hands, for we are all in no position to throw stones.

This is the time when we get to show the mercy that was given to us. Free.

Onward.

Cautiously stalking.... planning...... praying...

I just had a long long talk with my mom.. It appears that the storms are looming darker and closer, but I take heart in the fact that the house with foundations laid upon solid rock may be shaken but remains intact. I don't say this with foolish idealism. I say this staring at a whole bunch of crap, in the face.. It could be that things are not that bad. I would however choose to overdo things and do things with paranoid attention to detail.

I know better, however than to get overexcited and act rashly. I already did that once, with probably disastrous results. I stand by what I said, but i should have refined how I did it.

Pondering about that, I realise that this may be an extremely long process. God change our hearts.

Please do keep my family in prayer..

If you realise, I am not writing this stuff because it is a cool way to blog... i can't honestly say I'm a staunch soldier standing tall in the face of all this. I am kinda trembling for the most part, desperately wishing I could hide.. But I sense God's hand in this.. even though I never claim to sense things like that..

Onward.

Nerve-wrackingly-drained

There are times in your life when you KNOW you can't handle certain things. Some things are beyond your power to comprehend, let alone change.

On the outside you shudder and shake, and you swallow past a parched mouth, and try to stand tall.

On the inside you start to wonder whether its all worth it.

But in your head you you hope. you cling on to what you hear.. that it is all worth it.




I'd like to ask all of you to keep my family and I in prayer, as I probably begin the most craziest project of my life...

I want to make an effort to repair my family.

And I guess that isn't even the right way to phrase it...

I don't know.. Right now I have this insane adrenalin rush, where I want to fix it all with my bare hands. But at the same time this mad amount of grief where i wonder how things could have gone so wrong.

I am afraid. I really am, because I have no idea how this all will turn out.. It will probably be no big event or anything of that sort.. but I pray God changes hearts, hopefully starting from mine..

Powerful sermon

Today, Dr Tan Kim Huat from Trinity Theological College came to speak on Galatians...

Gal 6:7-10 MKJV
(7) Do not be deceived, God is not mocked. For whatever a man sows, that he also will reap.
(8) For he sowing to his flesh will reap corruption from the flesh. But he sowing to the Spirit will reap life everlasting from the Spirit.
(9) But we should not lose heart in well-doing, for in due season we shall reap, if we do not faint.
(10) So then as we have time, let us work good toward all, especially toward those of the household of faith.

Wow.. It was a good lesson and it will probably stick with me for a long time..

I can foresee myself obsessing over this and pondering for a few days haha...

Onward.

Happy Birthday Lisa

I hope you had a wonderful birthday!

I guess you will probably never read this, but I'll still write it..

May this new year of life reveal joy and life abundant...

Best of wishes to you.....

NS affairs

It seems that God is up to something, in the area of my NS appointments..

:)

I just got a call today from the army.. Turns out I now have a unit.. (finally)

I now belong somewhere! (Looks like I won't be needing my helmet much)

《鸽子》

Warning - emo overdose...

I bought the 杨宗伟 CD!


















For those of us who don't know, he's a guy who took part in the 绝对 Superstar competition in.. Taiwan i think..

He didn't win cause he quit halfway.. Apparently he lied when he put down his age in the application forms and so he pulled himself out..

But his performance was... well... you can see it for yourself la..


新不了情


背叛

back from the dead

Hello world... Its been a loooong time since i posted.. and yup its the holidays!

So far i'll be brief since its weird to blog after so long..

Things that have happened since my exams ended:

1) I got my results back.. They're just so-so.. I shouldn't be surprised.. The path i chose is an insane one... Lets continue to push the envelope. (SADISTIC SMILE)

2) I have eaten a lot of buffets! Too many, actually.. I should seriously start running often...

3) I have started doing some reading... I now know partially why my grades are like that... Soooo many gaps in my understanding...

4) Gotten slightly moody, and now better again.. Some things come in waves, and i guess longtime readers will know what i'm talking about.. But no worries.. I'm in control.. (well you're not really in control when a mood hits you, but you try to claw out of it and THEN you are in control)

5) Most importantly, gotten rested and relaxed... Maybe too relaxed... I'm starting some simple plans.. Lets see if they take off...

Onward.

I have a new connection!

After many months of putting up with a crap internet connection I have made the decision to switch to starhub..

And its extremely easy to even set up a wireless connection!

You just set up your router first, and make sure your security settings are done. You just have to set to DHCP automatic configuration (I'm using a Linksys WRT54G). Then just switch it off, and connect it to the cable modem. Switch both on, and everything works!

I should have been on starhub years ago.....

Undead Assault 2

I am half proud to say that I have introduced a game to church people, called Undead Assault 2. Simply put, it involves a team of up to 11 people holding out against a horde of zombie invaders.. Variations in the game include difficulty settings, and there's also a mode called Umbrella mode, where your team (the US Marines) have to try to control the sector despite Umbrella troopers' interference (read that as: kill the troopers and stay alive).

As you play the game you get to save and load, so you retain experience and unlock different classes, so you get to play as a medic, machine gunner, cyborg, forward observer.... the list goes on. So its kinda fun. Choosing the right classes lets you complement your team and succeed in the mission better.

So far its a good story, but the last time I played with CHURCH people, there was swearing going on, and I mean people swearing at each other. This is disgusting. I did not introduce the game so that we could swear at each other. Why is swearing while playing an e-game more acceptable than swearing while playing ping pong?

If i get the same amount of swearing while playing with church people compared with playing with people online, i will just play online. The next time i play on lan, i will leave the moment i hear swearing again.

Gy. Sgt boingboingboing

What signifies the end of the semester?

For some of us, its the exact time you walk out of the exam hall for the last paper.

For some of us, its the moment you go watch a movie with your friends.

For me, its the time when i burn all the files i used onto a DVD and keep it in a cold dark place....

What about you?

:D

Today's the day!!!

Today's the 7th...

The rollercoaster ride is ending...

Family Day

It was kinda fun, in a way, but also a let down in a way..

But i'm glad i took part, overall? It was my motivation to be running even through my studying.. And it kept me from getting sian.. Although i think for future family days i will just go down for a fun jog and nothing more.. I'm getting too old for this kind of intense stuff...

My motto for this semester is "看开一点". Yes. You don't get marks for stressing, but you get marks for showing your understanding. So rather than spend time freaking out, 看开一点, and go have a nice cup of tea. Then as you sit down, ask yourself "what else do I not understand?" Then attack your notes relentlessly.

Anyhow. i think i injured my left arm pushing off the 100m..

Pausing to think on the train made me realise that i have a million and one things to do after my exams, so thats kinda fun as well...

So remember, kiddos... 看开一点, or its NUS (No Use Studying)..

WOOHOOOOOO

My 5th May paper is MCQ!!!!!!!!!

i was expecting to write like 4 essays or some nonsense like that..

And let the papers begin...

28th April

2nd May

5th May

7th May

You know the feeling when you've just strapped yourself into a roller coaster and you know you have no choice other than to go ahead with it?

:D

Here we goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Classical Mechanics Test 2

All thanks be to God..

To be honest i was quite unsure of how things would have gone.. My friends seemed to prepare much faster than I did.. I was scribbling my help sheet up to 2-3 am in the morning.. (thats the pretty help sheets you saw in the previous post..)

I don't think I deserved to do well.. But God gave me peace...

I hope to push this mindset all the way into the final.. And gun for an A..

Can't really say how surprised I am.. But really really thankful...

Onward.

All the way!!!

Dear friends...

Its now a full scale assault on the finals!

Just finished my final term test...This is the armament that I brought in today.. Its the same A4 sheet... jut double sided..































That, my friends, is the product of MASSIVE kiasuism, a bad memory and the professor teaching more than the previous year's professor...

I'm now going for tze char dinner.

MUAHAHAHA. MAD SCIENTISTS NEED FOOD.

Ongoing training

No injuries!


Yay!

I really don't know what else to put here.. so...









Time to mugmugmugmugmug......

Fun in the lab

I used to think the stuff IN the lab (experiments) is okay, the stuff AFTER lab (aka reports) is horror.. But then there's viva..

Well for my labs i have to do viva, which is a question and answer session with someone (nobody knows what it stands for or how its supposed to be spelt so don't ask me).. In year 1, an Honours year student will come over and ask you stuff during your lab session.. For year 2, its a prof, and you go up to the prof to ask for viva... So since the prof is intellectually and technically superior to some undergrad, it gets a little more tricky, and hazardous...










Enter the engineering student.

Now, with no disrepect (yes Glenn, that was for you), physics students don't really like engine students.. for my batch, at least.. they get the better math lecturers when we take the same foundational math courses, the foundational math courses are more tuned to them than to us, they get more employment opportunities, and generally we absolutely hate the depth and rigour we have to deal with every time we see a derivation.. so we take it out on people who don't have to deal with the stuff we have to.. haha..

But as I was saying, enter the engine student.. and this guy actually took my experimental physics module! Engineers must take some basic physics courses, so it doesn't take very many modules to complete a physics minor. BUT HE TOOK LAB! Come on... there are other disgusting modules in physics to choose from.. My friends all hate lab module, by the way... it really eats tons of time.. you don't have to mug for it though.. there's no exam, just viva and a presentation at the end..

So this guy, goes up to this prof with THREE reports and wants to do viva for all of them. It is generally accepted that you NEVER go up to a prof with more than one report to viva at once. Unless you're running out of time, and deadlines are approaching, people sometimes do two. But as a guide, reports and your explanations to profs are usually riddled with little errors. And profs can get quite irritated by things like this. Imagine making mistakes, pulling out another report.. and then a 3rd? And when you make a mistake, you just accept it and say 'ohhhhh i see' unless you think the prof is trying to trick you and test if you know your stuff.. then stand your ground.

I walked into the lab that afternoon at about 3pm ready to do viva, but the lab was totally silent, except for ONE voice. Some prof was talking.. Viva! Some engineer was there.. I went to my friends who were reading at the old sofa near the white board... and they said :

"He's been there since 2. He's gotten eleven 'you are wrongs"

It was 310pm. In the space of 70 minutes the prof had yelled at him ELEVEN times
'YOU ARE WRONG!!!"

I think it takes quite a bit to get a 'YOU ARE WRONG' I did three vivas with that guy but i've only gotten so far as a 'no no no... thats not the way to do it..'

To be fair, not all the engineering students doing lab ended up like that guy.. He was just one example.. My friends in physics had quite a few 'YOU ARE WRONGs" too.

But.

90 minutes. 13 occurences.

That HAS to be a record.

Deleted Post

Ahhh... How we love decisions..

I deleted the last post because the information conveyed was sensitive.. But if you saw it, you saw it. If you didn't see it, you'll find out soon anyway ha..

If you're part of the group of people who the last post was for, then do me a favour and not mention it? Its not due for release yet..

Remember, brace yourselves for impact!

Hell week

Sleep deprivation... sucks...

COS FAMILY DAY 2008

WHY WHY WHY must it be in the middle of my examsssssss....

It is finished.

Returned her the stuff I need to return.

Its now time to store away the things I need to store away..

I wish memories would just fade faster..

Attending a talk

As I blog this I'm sitting at the back of a LT with a cup of free coffee, waiting for a talk to begin.

'Recent developments in measurement-based quantum computation', by Hans J. Briegel of the University of Innsbruck and IQOQI (Institute of Quantum Optics and Quantum Information), Austrian Academy of Sciences.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooookay.

Lets see how much I can 'catch'..

Gosh half my profs are here..

Glad tidings

Hello everyone..

A nice update... of the 3 midterms I've had so far, two were quite good, and 1 not so good.

And the essay I handed in I got a B+.

All glory to the Most High...

Onward.

The Return of the IBMac

Heyhey, my laptop is back! and yes they changed the motherboard..

So I should be able to abuse it anew.. But I take good care of it, I leave it on all week and subject it to a full antivirus test every weekday night at 2am. Not to mention its always nice and hot since my laptop cooler is at home. Okay maybe thats why its dying haha..

Anyhow its back to assignments and homework and tutorials and whatnot..

Oh yes. Plan for holidays, zhng the room (again). This time, mega-table under the bed. People like Mandia should know what I'm talking about.
Then I can rearrange the books and stuff..
Then, I can install the symbol that represents all of academia.



The one.
The only.
The White Board.



And all will fear me!


Maybe the laptop withdrawal has taken its toll..

What the pok...

Haha i finally happened everyone... My laptop fan went nuts with a really angry growling sound today, so I shut it down and started it up again.. But then it went BEEEEPBEEEEPBEEEEP!!! and the screen was black and said two words

Fan Error.

And then the thing shut down.. So I brought it to the service centre.. and it will be back in a few days I think... On a good note, my friend had the same problem and they changed his entire motherboard! woohoo..So lets see what happens.. I doubt that they will clean all the gunk inside.. So they should change it!

Muahahahahaha.

One of my USB ports is loose anyway..

Hopefully it comes back soon.. I might have stuff to print..

Thank you all for your support

Lunchtime post

Well its not exactly lunchtime.. Those of us in uni will know that lunchtime isn't really a constant.. Its more like a function of (homework/assignment due dates, time-you-wake-up, what time you had breakfast)

So I'll just define this lunchtime thing as the time I feel awake..

The past two days have been insane.. Not in the sense that I had a million assignments.. Its just that I had an extremely heavy burden on my shoulders.. I'll get to work on handling the situation.

This is just a shout-out to show that I'm somewhat still in control.. Although I sense that I stoned a bit this morning, and I was very desensitised to external events right after the email.. Not as bad as what I experienced before, but still detectable.

Onward.

Alarms

Okay I think I'm starting to get hit by a wave of depression..

Will take steps.

I see now

Maybe knowing what the Bible says doesn't mean you can apply it.

1Co 13:1-13 MKJV
(1) Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I have become as sounding brass or a tinkling cymbal.
(2) And though I have prophecies, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so as to move mountains, and do not have charity, I am nothing.
(3) And though I give out all my goods to feed the poor, and though I deliver my body to be burned, and have not charity, I am profited nothing.
(4) Charity has patience, is kind; charity is not envious, is not vain, is not puffed up;
(5) does not behave indecently, does not seek her own, is not easily provoked, thinks no evil.
(6) Charity does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices in the truth,
(7) quietly covers all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
(8) Charity never fails. But if there are prophecies, they will be abolished; if tongues, they shall cease; if knowledge, it will be abolished.
(9) For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.
(10) But when the perfect thing comes, then that which is in part will be caused to cease.
(11) When I was an infant, I spoke as an infant, I thought as an infant, I reasoned as an infant. But when I became a man, I did away with the things of an infant.
(12) For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall fully know even as I also am fully known.
(13) And now faith, hope, charity, these three remain; but the greatest of these is charity.

What do gifts do, if not used in love?

What the.

I will now fume and rant. So I'd appreciate no tags regarding this. Prayers are definitely appreciated...

Why does cold hard logic seem so inadequate when you deal with people..
Every time I apply my mind to something I seem to leave out the most obvious and the most trivial.

How come it is so easy to hurt the very people you don't want to hurt.
How come it is so easy to destroy something you want to repair.

How come I have to receive that mail tonight, when I have a test tomorrow.

Does trying to do the right thing, in an emotionless way imply a fresh wave of pain? Or is it simply impossible to shut out the emotions in doing things right, such that the pain was simply the thing I was trying to avoid?

Lord please change me. Let me do things right. Please. Please. Please.

Accident

Ooops I broke a cuvette today in the biophysics lab... I had to wear latex gloves, and i made the mistake of trying to wash two at the same time, and when i turned them over to drain the fluid one dropped into the sink with a sickening crash.. They're not very big, but it just shattered...















The moment I dropped it i went 'oh crap..' and my lab partner was quite surprised i dropped something two inches and it shattered..

The lab demonstrator went 'what happened???'

'Er I dropped one.. Does it cost a lot?'

She was quite wide eyed, then went to get another one, and told me 'try to be careful, they are expensive..'

No other incidents occured, but when i came back to my room and told my roommate he was quite O_O. 'er mel the ones in the biophysics lab aren't made of glass or plastic.. they're made of pure quartz cause some glass and plastics interfere with fluorescence spectroscopy.. one cuvette costs like 300 bucks.'

O_O

Good thing they didn't charge me for that...

I think I'll stick to pendulum bobs..

Forgiveness

In Tenderness He Sought Me

In tenderness He sought me,
Weary and sick with sin,
And on His shoulders brought me
Back to His fold again.
While angels in His presence sang
Until the courts of heaven rang.

Refrain:
Oh, the love that sought me!
Oh, the blood that bought me!
Oh, the grace that brought me to the fold,
Wondrous grace that brought me to the fold!

He washed the bleeding sin-wounds,
And poured in oil and wine;
He whispered to assure me,
"I've found thee; thou art Mine";
I never heard a sweeter voice;
It made my aching heart rejoice!

He pointed to the nailprints;
For me His blood was shed;
A mocking crown so thorny
Was placed upon His head:
I wondered what He saw in me
To suffer such deep agony.

I'm sitting in His presence,
The sunshine of His face,
While with adoring wonder
His blessings I retrace.
It seems as if eternal days
Are far too short to sound His praise.

So, while the hours are passing,
All now is perfect rest;
I'm waiting for the morning,
The brightest and the best,
When He will call us to His side,
To be with Him, His spotless bride.

WEDNESDAY NIGHT IS COMING

Haha.. anyone for wednesday night romance?

Insane tests day

Yoohoo everyone.. I had a very crazy day yesterday.. with two tests in the morning...

I was close to panicking.. but it went alright..

Classical mechanics was all right.. I actually understand most of it.. It was the thermo test that was crazy..

Lets see how it went..

It was supposed to start at 230, and end at 330. The lecture slot begins at 2 and ends at 4, so of course students will go into the LT and sit there, read, and wait for the thing to begin.. And we'd all expect the prof to say stuff like 'please spread out and don't sit so near each other'.

THIS PROF.

made everyone go to the back of the LT and stand there while he took like 10 minutes to put the answer sheets and questions papers on the appropriate seats.

what the.































AND THEN. we stood at the back while we waited for 230pm.
















absolutely amazing.

anyhow.. i started the test with my mind totally blank.. i was kinda exhausted already.. but i calmed down and things started making sense..

i guess i got lucky somehow.. the questions weren't too killer.. so even though i was still quite blur about a lot of things i could do most of the questions..

all in all, thank God for everything! He rewards those who seek to understand his creation haha..

Now to make the most of my one week break..

Onward..

Some thinking

Hello everyone.. Don't worry i'm not as emo as it sounds..

V-day came and went without much ado.. There was the usual array of people dressed up, girls holding bouquets and the lonelier ones not making any eye contact with anyone at all when they walk around on V-day. I made the fatal mistake of going through some of my past emails when I was asleep (yeah i rigged my phone to my laptop's bluetooth so i can actually email in bed as long as my laptop is online).. and looking back at the past hour, I could have plunged into another deep depression..

But the past weeks of discipline and mental stability have helped.. In my somewhat reckless reading, i realised there were so many markers that hinted, or rather screamed that things were going awry.. but those things were masked behind the 'i-miss-you's and the 'thinking-of-you's and the 'of-course-i'll-see-you-next-week's.. and of course there were things i somehow knew would affect us but i just pushed away..

So the long and the short of it is that i guess it still does hurt, quite a fair bit, to remember that i hurt someone i cared for very much.. The cold irony is that each of us are actually able to hurt the ones closest to us, because we matter the most to them.. That is something that i think most of us would agree with straight off, but personally, it will take me a long time to deal with.. Not just in relationships past, but also present and future..

I don't think I will ever be able to forget what happened, the lesson still scars deeply. But this is how consequences are, when more is at stake we begin to deal with heavier consequences... of course, handled correctly we deal with beautiful results..

Where am I in God's plan then? I don't think I really know.. I know that I am learning, that He is making me stronger through everything so far. As with any mistake we make, this one really makes me want to turn back time and fix everything..

But I suppose one of the lessons I took away is that some things can't be erased and rewritten like pencil scribblings on paper..

So many mess-ups. As someone who takes facts as-is, its not a very light thing.. Part of this whole chunk of a mess is learning to forgive myself. Without disrespect to all the people who have told me this, and who have shown concern before, its not an easy thing.. I don't see this as some small 'oops-i-changed-your-wallpaper' kind of thing.. its more like a 'oops-i downloaded-ten-viruses?' kind of thing..

So, it will be irresponsible for me to forget this whole thing.. Telling me to do that won't work.. I won't learn anything from forgetting..

I intend to continually ponder.. And I will understand myself.. and finally get a grip on my own life.

1Co 9:25-27 ESV
(25) Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable.
(26) So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air.
(27) But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.

Right..

Towards Christlikeness.. Onward.

Deep Discussion

Okay.. I realise its 1am wednesday morning now, but the discussion I am referring to is the one a couple of friends and I had on monday night, that lasted into the wee hours of tuesday morning..

How do you prove God exists? Put a mathematician and 3 physicists in a room and let them slug it out.

It was a very deep and intriguing conversation.. Flowing back and forth between logic and faith, we had a very good time delving through each other's thoughts and arguments and whether certain statements were valid or not..

Through the entire discussion I realised it wasn't really about who was correct or who had the best belief system.. I realised that to build up a Christian belief system from logic alone will inevitably end in a system that leaves out certain parts of the Bible, because things come in that logic cannot hope to comprehend. Faith, hope, and love.

1Co 13:13 ESV
(13) So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Logic cannot build these things from any system.

I choose to base it on Biblical truth. I choose to look for logical consistencies in the Bible, because I believe that the Bible is inspired by a logical Mind. But, as it is written,

Isa 55:8-9 MKJV
(8) For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor your ways My ways, says Jehovah.
(9) For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts.

We cannot rely on logic alone if we want to have a relationship with God. Logic will allow us to deduce certain characteristics that we think God should have, but it does not help us in building a relationship with Him. The crux of the Christian faith is... faith.

Indeed, there is a limit to what our human minds can grasp of who God is. But the study of His Word brings about refreshing truths, and is always rewarding, bringing us closer to the nature of the Most High.

ROOMING PROBLEM 3

SO

i went to talk to 'the man' yesterday. for those of us not in the know, 'the man' is a generic term for anyone of authority, power, or basically THE ENEMY.

so anyhow.. me, the guy who swopped with me (actually a seriously nice guy from china who's super agreeable to everythign so far, including the swop and today's meeting), my physics roomie and the RA went down to talk to them..

and basically it was like some interrogation, they interviewed us all one at a time, asked us for reasons... explained why they have to be difficult.. blahblahblah

AND.

they said they'd give us a decision by next week..

rightttttttt

gosh this is just encouraging people to do illegal room changes.. had i not declared my swop during the room verification, and just pretended to be a guest in the room the request would probably have gone through, and they would have approved this by now..

argh

the price of honesty.

ROOMING PROBLEM 2

As expected... the letter to move back has come...

NO SURRENDER!

I'm going with the RA to talk to the person tomorrow..

Wish me luck.

ROOMING PROBLEM

WHAT ON EARTH.

I now declare a state of war on the Office of Student Affairs..

Those of you who know I'm in hall will probably I managed to swop my room with someone so that I could room with my buddy Jay...

So being good students we of course notified the Office of Student Affairs about the swop.. And the person said that ' I may assist you in this request provided that all parties (including the students in that current room) are to be included in your email saying that everyone is agreeable to this arrangement. '

So we swopped rooms and emailed the relevant 'i agree' emails to the person..

A couple of days ago, there was a room verification, where our Block Resident Assistants (something like a block IC) come over to check our Matric Cards to see who exactly is staying in the room.. And we of course notified the RAs that we put up a request to swop room, and all parties are agreeable.. And of course they wrote it down on their papers that we swopped rooms..

So the papers were submitted and of course the extremely childish OSA had to deny our 'request' to swop rooms because we swopped rooms BEFORE the okay was given. Even though all parties were already agreeable.

Right. And I'm now awaiting an official letter that will probably say 'get your butt back to your original room' even though its like week 3 and i'm super happy in my room with all my friends popping by to chat and say hi and we're solving till 2am in the morning and that kind of masochistic stuff. Thing is, I'm actually happy in my room, and i really don't want to lose the arrangement.

PRAY AGAINST THE BLOODY ADMINISTRATION.

morning alertness

wow i'm awake early.. well its before ten and i have no classes..

breakfast - 三鲜饺子拉面 and coffee

woo!!!

hungry hungry hungry

The heat begins

OK.. Now that the 2 weeks of lessons without tutorials are almost done with, (honeymoon period is over) the tempo is beginning to heat up..

For a start all of my fortnightly tutorials are on odd weeks.. Well, i only had a choice for one of them.. but i chose odd weeks not knowing the rest were fixed.. Bleah.. I'm bad at gambling i guess..

But it hasn't been bad.. I've moved into my hall quite comfortably..
















I take the right half.. we managed to clean it up some.. It still needs a massive mopping but most of the dust is cleaned out already.. The guy sitting there is Jay.. my physics pal..

And yes.. I remember promising to work doubly hard, so keep me in prayer, and keep tagging..

School has begun

School's up!

A new beginning and a new start..

流泪撒种必欢呼收割。

Pressing on..

2008

Right...
Let's get down to this..

The past year has been a very... intriguing one..
If we get past all the nonsense that I had to go through...

The Lord has been faithful.
In the times that i obeyed, the Lord revealed that there is a reason for His will.
This will be my motivation for the coming year, that I will believe in the joy that will come from obedience..

Those who sow in tears shall reap in joy.
He who goes forth and weeps, bearing precious seed, shall doubtless come again with rejoicing, bringing his sheaves with him.

-Psalms 126:5-6

My friends have been amazing.
I honestly cannot believe the number of times I have been blessed by the people around me.. I really don't understand this friendship thing.. We have varying degrees of friendships.. Some friends you say hi to only because you saw them coming round the corner, and you can't get away in time... Some friends you smile at once a week cause after the worship some genius has to tell you to go and shake the hands of 5 people before you sit down... Some friends you call when you need help with homework... Some friends are only there for tennis or DOTA...

And yet, this very intriguing system and compartmentalisation of friendships has been slowly moulded into a less rigid system.. The Lord has been revealing that friends are not just grouped into this category labelled 'friends', like parking aunties.. To us we don't really see the parking auntie as an individual, just as a role.. And increasingly this friend thing is more and more an individual person thing.. Its more than how deep you are into this friend role thing. Its a totally different mind boggling puzzle when there is a different person involved each time you interact.

Anyhow, I'm proud to have friends such as you guys.. And how deep this friendship is not really as measurable as I once thought it was..

Thank you ALL for your acceptance, and your time and your wise advice over the year.. Thank you all for talking to me, for listening to me and for thinking (hard) with me in the many things we've all had to go through.. Whether its things in school, things in church or just thingies, those things made up my year, and thank you all..

In writing the above i officially declare here that I feel like a socially retarded person because these are things that young children should have seen in growing up, and not when they are 22.. But better late than never, and we will press on in our growth.

Never give in.

A day in Jo-Ying's lab

Hello everyone!

What better way to spend Hari Raya than to visit Joanne in the lab?

(actually i was so bored i had nothing better to do la)

But it was a super eye opener when i went down on Thursday..

A little bit of an intro.. Her project is on porcine coronary arteries.. (if you didn't know what that meant then it doesn't really matter so never mind.. there are pictures)


Firstly.. the lab..

















Next, the scientist in action.. She's handling some tubes...

















Starting with the heart...
















Digging in to get the artery..































Cutting away the fat around the artery..
















And we have... ONE ARTERY!!!!!!
















Holy cow imagine doing that for five hearts, excising two arteries per heart...

I am definitely glad i have my equations instead..

Deeper reflections

To be very honest I've been thinking about relationships.. And I guess you could call it girl-crazy but thats not really the point.. Its not about girls.. Its more about ME.

Yup! I get to be self centred here.. But my reflections have been on a few things..

Whether i think i need a 'person'.. The answer is yes.

Whether i'm ready for a 'person'.. The answer is no.

Why I'm not ready.. The answers are numerous.

How to be ready.. The answer is God.

Indeed, only God can fix me. I will walk with that limp. I will see things around me and get affected by that scar. I will cry when I need to. I will cry knowing He is near, and that He holds me close. And I will continually give up what I need to.

Psa 147:1-4
(1) Praise Jehovah; for it is good to sing praises to our God; for praise is delightful and becoming.
(2) Jehovah builds up Jerusalem; He gathers together the outcasts of Israel.
(3) He heals the broken-hearted, and binds up their wounds.
(4) He appoints the number of the stars; He calls them all by their names.

Post-camp reflections

We broke camp yesterday.. and there were some disappointments, also some causes for celebration..

I sound emo because i AM emo.. so... yeah..

I served as mentor for my group.. I'm just glad to say that I tried my best to explain what I could.. I saw that the things I bothered to sit down and think through before, all came in useful in teaching..

And not only in teaching.. When I was revising through my reflection session for day 1.. I realised that the Scriptures I was looking through.. some seemed familiar.. some seemed unfamiliar..

All of them ministered to me..

So once again I think i was blessed in that..

As for disappointments.. I think I have shared enough about them to certain people who need to hear them.. So those will be past me..



Something that will stick to me is Pastor Ronald Yow's first message.. On Genesis 32:22-32..

Jacob changed his grip. He realised his wives would not help, his sons would not help, his livestock would not help. He was going to face his brother the next morning, whom he had stolen a birthright from. He took that time alone and he sought God.

Jacob changed his name. Through wrestling with God all night, God gave Jacob a new name. No longer a liar, no longer a thief.. But now he was Israel, the first of a nation. That new name reflected a change in character..

Jacob changed his walk. No longer would he walk in the same way.. He gained that limp.. But he had that new name..

On the third point, something came to me.. It seemed that Jacob was.. scarred.. somehow.. He won that exchange.. but he had that scar.. He had a permanent limp.


How many of us know we have to face that Esau sooner or later? How many of us know that we have to do it sooner or later but have no guts to do it? How many of us know God's direction but are reluctant to move ahead?

Like I said I'm feeling kinda emo.. so there..

Still deep in thought.. So will appreciate any prayers..

Passport : Children's Camp 2007

I miss my kids!!!!!!

For those who don't know.. I went to help out in Children's Camp straight after my exams, and man it was a blast!

I seriously didn't quite feel like going.. I kinda wanted a break, and being put as a group leader in the camp didnt' seem like a very comfortable spot..

But i went.. and got to know my little team of leaders and shepherds.. and the kids are absolutely amazing in so many diverse ways..






























Teaching children is really a test of how well you know your stuff.. I feel you don't really know your stuff unless you can explain it in terms other people can understand.. and who better to test explanations on than younger children? (I should refrain from the word 'kids' cause my p6 kids don't really like being called kids anymore haha)

I realise i am not being very.. focused on the things i bring up here, but its either my sleep deprivation during the camp, or my current sleep debt thats messing up my brain now.. so you'll all just have to bear with me for now..

There was one evening.. where the camp speaker Andrew asked the children to come up to their teachers and pray for them..

I wish I could put into words what i felt when they prayed for me.. The sincerity they showed in those simple prayers..

More than tongue can tell.

I left the camp having received more than I gave..

(AND WE WON BEST PERFORMANCE MUAHAHAHA)

Yes.. so i strongly encourage everyone in YPM to consider helping in CM camps..

Mel

Stand down

Hello all stations, this is Super Sunray, Message, Over

02, Send, Over.

Super Sunray, Paradise now, Over.

02, Confirm, Paradise now, Over.

Super Sunray, I say again, Paradise now.

02, Roger wilco.

Super Sunray, out.

Spoke too soon

Okay, okay...

It is STILL a crazy time.

Matter of hours left...

So much to crammmmmmmmmmmmm......

Mel

Thank you all

Hello everyone...

I have one last paper on saturday and i swear its been a crazy time..

I wouldn't know what I would do without all the little encouragements I get from all of you guys time and time again..

Deeply appreciated..

I think I will do quite badly this semester.. But I will make it up to all of you guys by working doubly hard next sem..

Its the best way I know to thank all of you..

Mel

Erosion

At this point i think it is taking every ounce of mental strength to keep from just breaking down..

I need a break. I need to discipline myself over and over again.. Seems like i keep panicking during exams..

I need a miracle..

Hangover

In honour of my sister's recent hangover episode, I present to you.....



Sinfest..












Mel

Personality test

After much fierce resistance i decided to do the Myers-Brigg personality test, one example of which is here.

Turns out that website thinks that I am a INTJ, which stands for Introverted iNtuitive Thinking Judging..

Below are the traits that are evaluated through the test..

Introverted / Extroverted
iNtuitive / Sensing
Thinking / Feeling
Perceiving / Judging

Seems like some of the analysis discussed in this article seems to reflect the way I do things.. How accurate is this stuff? Maybe it only works for me.. Maybe some of you can try it out and leave a tag..

Back to work..

Mel

late night thoughts - BGR

As I begin this post i must first say that i am no expert when it comes to BGR. I am not in a successful relationship and I doubt i will be anytime soon. However there are some things that must be said, lest it be assumed that i have nothing to say about the matter.

This post may seem to be extremely personal against one particular person, and full of mud-slinging. I however assure all of you that as i voice my opinions the sword cuts into my own heart as well.

Do I then hold back from saying the truth? I cannot. Because if we were all to hold back from speaking the truth because of our own faults then we would have a diluted and perverted fellowship, each one refusing to confront wrong.

The only way out, then, is to bravely confront the wrong.

I must first talk about emotions.. Emotional neediness. Now.. I'm not exactly the greatest person to preach about the subject. But I will talk about this because it matters.

I'm talking about depending too much on a BGR for companionship. I am talking about repeated BGRs one after another, with no seeming purpose.

I think the cause for emotional neediness is definitely a warped view of relationships. I believe God did not intend a life like that for us. Why would we need to rush headlong into something over and over again, gambling for the 'right' one? What are we looking for? Satisfaction? A rush? Some Hollywood romance scene?

What happens two weeks after the love comedy? Some horror show?

If you're not afraid of the horror show something must be insanely wrong. The very concept of relationships demand trust. And trust involves vulnerability.

Something with great potential for good can cause an equally destructive effect if handled wrongly. Look at all the examples in the Bible. The kings of Israel had so much responsibility.. But usually it boiled down to a 'yes' or 'no' decision. Obey, or sin. The consequences were straightforward too.. And they were kinda huge..

In this case, this vulnerability matters. Humans scar. The world is filled with desensitised people, all trying not to hurt, all trying to care less..

They were vulnerable. They're not vulnerable anymore..

What's the horror show in this case? It could be that someone is be left scarred. Some more, some less. The bigger horror show is the person doing the scarring.

Who's the scarier person in the horror shows? The victim or the perpetrator?

There is a real danger, of falling prey into something you are trying to fix. In order to deal with your emotional needs you try to get into more relationships to get your fix. The person who ends up the most scarred is the one with the warped views..

For everyone else who gets hurt, they will probably be less able to trust, and be vulnerable..

For this person with repeated BGRs?

How long will you repeatedly neglect God's divine Will for relationships?

And indeed, for myself as well. How long will I repeatedly neglect God's divine Will for my relationships in my life?

Amandia and Cara's Birthday! (in alphabetical order)

ok before i forget, their birthday was celebrated on.. weds..

i need to make a birthday list..


oh no lemme check if i took pictures of them both

oops i didn't.. i have videos off my phone.. but i'll figure out how to fix that after my finals..

Anyhow, Fabius and I bought for Amandia (she needs to destress):

6 boxes of fruit tea, all in different flavours..

and for Cara, under the contractor theme:

a hard hat

a lego-ish calendar (you can rearrange the thing every month)

and a photo frame with a window like something from her office


it was massive fun
















haha and yes we packaged the tea in some super super long stick..

ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS.. mandia couldn't stop laughing

before i start cramming

Finally.. my internet connection seems to be slightly more reliable now..

Won't be on MSN cause i deleted it.. I'll be back after my exams..

Now to post some pictures i've been meaning to post for a long time..

Firstly, New Balance Realrun..
































The coolest thing about the run was that they actually printed my name on my tag!! How cool is that.. They gave us all a chip too, to record our time.. I didn't run very fast.. Spent a lot of time waiting for Fabius.. *frown* lesson learnt.. next time we go for runs, we just do our own thing.. it costs too much to be waiting for each other.. Completed 10km in 1:13:25.. which is kinda slow..

Next... Chen Ming in operation
















we were solving maths in the physics lab.. er yeah it sounds weird.. but the lab has an abundance of white boards haha.. and yes sarah the marker comes in handy..

And lastly my latest purchase, the Creative Zen 2GB

















Its only 2Gb, cost me 149.. but its small, and light.. has inbuilt speakers and they have a little stand for you to put the player in, to focus the sound in a certain direction.. cute if you want to use it in the office or something.. but otherwise not really that useful.. the earphones dangling are the Crossroads X3 i posted up earlier.. so far i think Samson has heard the quality.. I should have taken a picture of his face when he was listening to it.. haha.. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

righty.. thats all for an update.. take care everyone.. back to my physics immersion..

We Might As Well Be Strangers - Keane

I don't know your face no more
Or feel the touch that I adore
I don't know your face no more
It's just a place I'm looking for
We might as well be strangers in another town
We might as well be living in a different world
We might as well
We might as well
We might as well

I don't know your thoughts these days
We're strangers in an empty space
I don't understand your heart
It's easier to be apart

We might as well be strangers in another town
We might as well be living in a another time
We might as well
We might as well
We might as well be strangers
Be strangers
For all I know of you now
For all I know of you now
For all I know of you now
For all I know

The heat is on

Alllright..

Exams start on the 24th of November. Thats in 31 days. NUS kids will know that this is now double digit week.. Week 10.. It signifies the beginning of the end haha..

Lessons aren't over.. but i'm already beginning to mug. This involves cutting lessons that don't help much, and forcing my mind to fully understand everything myself. I think lectures are great.. you can see for yourself how the thing unravels and stuff.. but some things.. you gotta sit down with a book and thrash out the details on your own..

I think for science subjects it means more if you understand stuff on your own, and if you are able to actually explain stuff to someone who has no idea what you're learning. That's what learning is right?

Argh. Blasted material. Need my brain to work faster.

Oh haha on another note.. i went for a run on monday night.. I almost stomped on a frog that dashed out onto the pavement like 3 steps in front of me.. Then it started raining.. ugh..

Being random today.. kinda tired.. i'll try to update more often..

Finally

Okay.. My midterms are over.. for now..
There's still one or two lurking around.. I don't have the energy, or the heart, to check when they occur..

Anyhow.. My Analysis test today was unexpectedly good.. I don't know.. I made mistakes (as usual) but somehow it seemed that the work I put in through the semester started to show through.. and i managed to think analytically (which i suppose is one of the things the module is trying to achieve)

So... Tonight has been spent relaxing.. doing some room clearing.. Doing some thinking, not of the emo kind but of the slow reflection kind.. Its been a good evening..

Oh yes. My coffee ban didn't really work out.. I had two coffees since monday. But those of you who know my coffee addiction would know that TWO is the number of coffees i usually take in a day. So lets keep this going.. I actually feel more awake nowadays.. Thanks for the prayers all...

Mel

P.S. oh yes i went for a run yesterday. my legs hurt.. its been too long.. and yes i went for a run the evening before a test.. oh well it worked out..

BEER!!!

haha many thanks to sarah for sending me the link

BEER!

Mylarone X3

Ok before i go back to work..

The search is over!!!

















I've found the earphones i want.. now its time to just head down to the shop and test them out..

Woohoo!

If anyone wants to get them too now is the time to yell out.. I can make the trip this weekend..

Study study study

Hello everyone..

got some thoughts straightened out so i think i can manage to be stable for a while..

anyhow.. some pictures taken from the library yesterday afternoon.. just my luck.. the first time i decide to sit by the window it rains ha..















But then it got beautiful again....















I was hoping people wouldn't notice some geek taking pictures out the window.. (Like i was taking some pictures of ghosts.. )

鬼啊！！！


But anyhow.. This part of a song came to my mind yesterday..
Who am I?
That the voice that calms the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me.

Okay back to work.. its surprisingly empty in the library tonight.. must be some great conspiracy.. the science library isn't supposed to be quiet and empty. its supposed to be full of muggers.. There's a disturbance in the force.

And i should add myself to the number of muggers.. back to work.. test on friday bleah.. wish me luck!

Psalm 77

I cried out to God with my voice -
to God with my voice;
And He gave ear to me.
In the day of my trouble I sought out the Lord;
My hand was stretched out in the night without ceasing;
My soul refused to be comforted.
I remembered God, and was troubled;
I complained, and my spirit was overwhelmed.

You hold my eyes open;
I am so troubled that I cannot speak.
I have considered the days of old,
The years of ancient times.
I call to remembrance my song in the night;
I meditate within my heart,
And my spirit makes diligent search.

Will the Lord be cast off forever?
and will He be favourable no more?
Has His mercy ceased forever?
Has His promise failed forevermore?
Has God forgotten to be gracious?
Has He in anger shut up His tender mercies?

And I said, "This is my anguish;
But I will remember the years of the right hand of the Most High."
I will remember the works of the Lord;
Surely I will remember Your wonders of old.
I will also meditate on all Your work,
And talk of your deeds.
Your way, O God, is in the sanctuary;
Who is so great a God as our God?
You are the God who does wonders;
You have declared Your strength among the peoples.
You have with Your arm redeemed Your people,
The sons of Jacob and Joseph.

The waters saw You, O God;
The waters saw You, they were afraid;
The depths also trembled.
The clouds poured out water;
The skies sent out a sound;
Your arrows also flashed about/
The voice of Your thunder was in the whirlwind;
The lightnings lit up the world;
The earth trembled and shook.
Your way was in the sea,
Your path was in the great waters,
And Your footsteps weer not known.
You led Your people like a flock
By the hand of Moses and Aaron

regrets

sorry to be emo..



and yes she was my superwoman..

she's never coming back though.

don't worry.. i'll just take some time.. i'll be alright..

Resolution

I think I need to get a grip on my life...

All the coffee, the listlessness...

the phasing in and out of attention..

COFFEE BAN FOR ONE WEEK.

and i mean it.


my mind seems to now only work in spurts of activity.. i can't seem to muster a slow attentive state of calm anymore.. which is strange.. i blame the caffeine and my lack of trust in God for peace..

drained

test tomorrow...

exhausted..

emotionally empty..

recovering from the flu..

and yet.. not falling apart.. somehow...

It is His strength that sustains. His promises give hope.. His presence that fills completely..

ARGH

i started getting depressed just now.. kept listening to sad songs, and especially 我懂了她 by 李圣杰.. No prizes for guessing what i was thinking about.

Aaaanyhow.. i figured it wasn't going to help. and anyhow i've got at test on Thursday.. Sometimes its not what we're thinking, or how we're affected that breaks us down.. Sometimes its also whether we want to try to act according to our feelings, or whether we want to act in an appropriate way..

I think even after a whole year in uni i really haven't gotten down to serious study.. Serious as in.. to really get to know my stuff, to memorise and to be able to explain things at a second's notice..

That's my goal from now i suppose.. Even knowledge accumulation, is a stewardship.

Keep praying everyone..

Mel

Creation Conference!

Hello everyone... I wanted to post this yesterday, but i was kinda tired..

Anyhow Creation Conference was a blast! It really took my breath away, to see some strong support for Creationist views, when the scientific world is increasingly Evolutionist.

I also got the chance to have a little chat with a Physics professor, Dr John Hartnett.. He gave me his name card and told me to let him know if i ever wanted to do postgraduate studies.. Whoa.. He also said they were always looking for good students.

I wonder if i fit the bill.











But i suppose you guys want to know the REALLY JUICY stuff. The really really fun things that I learned at the conference.

Well for one thing, conference attendees are labelled into 2 types. The faithful and the fallen. HAHA

Faithful - Pamela and my sister

















Fallen - Daphne and Yunhui















If you notice the orientation of the photos you'll note i was in the centre, and the next in line to fall asleep haha.. But to be fair it was one of the physics talks and very few people understood what was going on.. It was also one of the late afternoon talks..

Ok ok... You want the proper juicy stuff.

Well creationism is like.. believing what the Bible says. If the Bible says six days of creation, then creation took six days. If the Bible says there was a flood, then there was a flood. The Bible is the authority.. Whether we understand how it all works out, is another thing..

This makes sense if we think about anything else the Bible says. Take salvation for example. We know God loves us, but we can never really comprehend the extent or the kind of love He has for us.. But we know it is there, and we have that faith that His love never fails.

If we take the Bible as truth, we will take the whole Bible as truth..

This means doing away with explanations like millions of years passing in between Day 1 and Day 2 of creation. There was no reason to believe that anything other than EARTH days were implied in the text..

Wow. so much to know.. You know its like I always believed? That creation reflects His glory. This entire universe is the work of His hands.. This conference is like a booster jab for that belief.

Ok thats all I'll write.. I might write more soon..

Ta..

Mel

I'm tired...

I think i'm tired.. like really tired..

I need a break on sunday.. I suggest going someplace for coffee, chilling and reading a book. Who's with me? I suggest TCC at City Hall.

On a nicer side note, I attended the first day of Creation Conference 2007..

I don't know how long the link will last but oh well..

It was seriously refreshing, to see that there is concrete empirical evidence for some of the things suggested in the Bible, like a sudden flood, and that some processes need not have taken as long as we previously imagined.

I'm just tired though, had a horrible quantum test in the morning. Project to submit by tomorrow.

Do tutorial first..

I am seriously going for the coffee thing.. or maybe there's another alternative, like chill in church.. but i need some quiet with soft music.. i can do the music thing in my room, but there are too many textbooks and sets of lecture notes everywhere.. I think I get stressed just walking into my room.

Aahhhh...

Maybe i should take some time to spend with the Lord first..

I got bluffed by probability

Sigh. I could do the sums but i didn't trust my math...

Anyhow, for anyone who's interested, it is actually possible to get an average value of infinity for a theoretical situation..

ARGH.

On to quantum mechanics.

OH YES.... i forgot to rant..

Okay this is juicy, so i can already sense hands being rubbed together in glee..

on Sunday (last day of sept) i went into chapel and stood at the back for a bit.. cause my usual spot was filled and i didn't really want to go into the front.. I thought I'd wait till the YPMS kids cleared out or something.. (I didn't know there was no YPMS that day la).

So some woman comes up to me and starts talking.. To be honest I wasn't paying attention to her. I thought she wanted to stand at the back too.. I was paying attention to the lyrics anyhow.

She kept looking at me and talking, and when I turned to her she was saying

'somethingsomethingblahblah... there was a comment that people are standing at the back, and its not very nice okay. so can you go to the front"

and she was just looking at me.

WAH. I tell you. I held her gaze for a full ten seconds. I wanted to tell her exactly how fat she was, how lousy her dressing was, how stupid she sounded and that she also forgot to say good morning. It is extremely amazing how fast your mind can fly, when you have such unholy motivation.

On second thought I should have just asked her how to receive Jesus. She would have fainted if she had realised that she might have been talking to someone NOT from church circles.

Anyhow after i held my gaze and gave her the most intense glare of my life, (note that I am a
full head taller than her and i'm not that tall), i just said okay, and walked forward.

However thats not the point. Its how you say things. She didn't even have the decency to smile. She didn't start with a good morning, or end with a thank you.

Anyhow.. the whole stupid incident left me feeling angry for the whole of the fast songs... wah.. i just stood there and fumed and fumed. i wanted to trip her, throw eggs at her, break some bones, bribe kids to walk to her and go "ARGH!! scary woman!!! mommyyyy!!!!"

She knows absolutely nothing about me, let alone know me.

Then it hit me. There are a 2 ways to get through the next few minutes. Fume, or forgive. I'm no saint here, it took me like ten minutes to start praying and tell God.. i'm going to forgive her, and i'm not going to pursue the matter.

That was when i really relaxed, and I was able to sing.. and let go.. and Ross Paterson was right, Matt did a great job of worship leading *appreciative applause*.

the next question is how i'm going to get through the next few sundays. It will take more patience, and more forgiveness.

So if any of you read this.. I suggest that if some wierdo comes up to you while you're leaning on the wooden panels on sunday, smile widely, shake his/HER hand and say "Peace, brother/SISTER. Good morning."

argh just talking about this makes me sian

Anyhow. I wonder if i actually passed that test. I did manage to calm down, and absorb the sermon and everything, but maybe there was something else i could have done.

Suggestions? leave some comments or leave a tag.

Onwards to Christlikeness.

Mel

P.S.

anyhow.. here's a picture of the quiet Year 1 Physics lab at 11 in the morning..














It's actually quite serene, with the lights off and sunlight streaming through the windows. Maybe its a relative thing cause i'm trying to cram probability. AH BACK TO WORK

The tests are here

Okay.. its going to be boring for a while..

I'm having tests this week and for a little while...

It's time to clear my explosion of a table and head down to hitting the books..

probability test tomorrow weights 40%.

hoooo boy..

Hopefully I can drive up the probability density function of my grades.
(if you understood that, you also understand that i no longer have faith that marks are deterministic.)

Coffee coffee coffee

Mel